Garcia reminisces about his life back at home, safe and sound, with Roberta. The way she poured him juice, the way they played with the Lovelace family samoyed, the way she would take care of him and his father...
But everything will be fine, at least in Garcia's mind, because he knows Roberta will take him home. She's a superhero-slash-mother to him. But because Garcia puts Roberta on a pedestal, he's going to be in for the shock of his life when he witnesses his sweet, loving maid go batshit crazy on the Colombian cartel.
Rock wishes that Garcia didn't have to witness the real, dirty streets of sex-starved Roanapur. But Garcia doesn't care--he doesn't turn away in disgust or try to sneak a peek at a boob. He's so...robotic. I think Roberta's monotonous nature has rubbed off on him too much. Rock is impressed by Garcia's confidence, as he wishes he had a solid family like that (it kind of makes sense now as to why Rock never seemed bothered by the fact that he'd never see his family again). And of course, Revy has to ruin the sentimental moment with her disgust. If she ends up having to rescue Rock during one of their missions, he'll no longer be one of them. Somehow, I don't believe her.
The gang makes it to Yellowflag just in time to witness Roberta wiping out the Colombians with a flick of her umbrella:
Roberta takes out several Colombians with style. Locking on to them with her eyes "like a killer," she never even flinches, using only her suitcase and her umbrella as a shield.
What is she, the damn Terminator? Maybe the daughter of the Terminator--Arnie didn't need a shield. Meanwhile, Black Lagoon discusses their exit strategy underneath a table. They consider leaving Garcia behind since he's not worth all the trouble they've gotten themselves into already, but because of the circumstances (Roberta being Garcia's maid), they can. And when Rock finds out, well his emotions take over. You know how that goes.
The bartender adds up all the damage that's been done to his bar (again). If he wasn't making a killing serving to Roanapur's lowest common denominator, he'd probably just say, "Fuck it," and roll on up out of there. Though sometimes I wonder if it's really worth it.
The shooting stops once the Colombians realize that Black Lagoon is here. They're like, "WTF? Where's our package?" and to them, it looks like Black Lagoon is betraying them. But this isn't the time or place to be discussing such matters, so Dutch tells them that they will talk later. They leave in a huff.
Roberta momentarily goes back to her sweet, innocent self when she sees what's left of Garcia's innocence there. Roberta tells him not to be afraid, and then raises her umbrella gun at Black Lagoon. In response, Revy holds her cutlass to Garcia's head. Damn, I wonder if she blasts the smirk off of babies' faces if they look at her funny.
Roberta then turns her gun to Revy; no one dares touch "young master"! Roberta says a phrase in Spanish, which Rock translates to, "A blessing for the living, a branch of flowers for the dead. Wield a sword for justice, the punishment of death for the villains..." The Lovelace family creed. Good thing Rock is coincidentally fluent in Spanish. Then again, it's not all-that surprising for a businessman to be bilingual.
Anyway, Roberta doesn't trust Revy to let Garcia go without bullet holes in his Bloomingdales trousers, so bullets away.
And here, we have for the first time, Revy getting hurt. Yes, folks. This girl, who dodged every bullet from the Extra Order terrorists, maneuvered her way around a neo-Nazi ship with enough iron and explosives in its arsenal to take out an entire city, survived countless beatdowns and attacks that would have killed anyone the first or second time, finally got knocked to the ground unconscious... by jumping in front of a grenade launcher.
This is one of those classic cases of irony where, in the real world, everything that Revy's done to avoid being hit would actually kill you. Here, Revy actively jumps in the direction of the blast from the grenade launcher, and that's what knocks her into a concussion.
Black Lagoon decides to high-tail it out of there before they, too, get blasted. Rock lingers back a little to console Garcia, who is still in shock because his sweet, innocent Roberta is now completely unrecognizable. Rock carries him out of the remains of the bar, and Garcia locks eyes with Roberta. I feel like I should really be keeping a closer look at the moments when we see Roberta's eyes--mostly when they make some sort-of connection (or misconnection) with Garcia's. It's as if she, too, recognizes his fears.
And still the cartel remains, which leads to Roberta to climax with her grand finale: grenades by way of dress:
The last of the cartel dies.
Rock makes sure he has Garcia before everyone heads into the car. Dutch is like, "Rock, why do you have to be such a candy ass?" Poor Rock--he's going to be stuck with all the moral attributes of this series from now on instead of being the crafty planner like when he took down Extra Order.
Then again, it doesn't help when he turns everyone's death into an existential freestyle poem. We get it, Rock, you're sensitive. Now get your ass in the car.
They drive off, and then Roberta emerges from the flames.
 |
| Add some pig's blood, and we have Carrie. |
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| Perhaps the bar owner should go back to night school and find a different career path. |
Balalaika has it all under control. Boris asks if they're going to war after "playing Mafia for so long," but she says they owe Dutch a favor.
Dutch shoots out the engine in Roberta's stolen car. Roberta unleashes her inner Terminator by pulling Dutch almost completely out of the passenger window of the car before her engine dies and she's forced to let go. She waits there, menacingly, while Dutch and Benny figure out how to take her down. So the real question here is: What would Sarah Connor do?
As they're trying to escape, a car comes flying down from a building, with Roberta in the driver's seat shooting at the tires.
From here, Roberta crashes and breaks out of the car with only the palm of her hand--through the glass. And then she chases down BL on foot. Oh, come on, this is just blatantly copying the T-1000.
Roberta latches onto the car with a damn wicked dagger with spiked brass knuckles attached. And for the final time this episode, Roberta and Garcia's eyes meet.
OVERALL:
STORY - This could be Black Lagoon's take on Terminator. Although there is no SkyNet to prevent, it still begs the question as to how and why Roberta is this robot killer bent on keeping Garcia safe and annihilating anyone that gets near him. Keeping Revy out of the way for half the episode was a great idea to show that there is something more destructive and powerful than the Black lagoon mercenaries.
4.5 / 5
CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT - Garcia takes this one, and possibly Roberta. Have you ever known someone so sweet and so gentle that even the thought of them squishing a mosquito is strange? Imagine that same person going Rambo one day in a crowded mall or airport. You'd be in shock, too.
4 / 5
BADASSERY - I'm slashing points for being too obvious with the Terminator references, but I'm adding a few back because Arnie.
4 / 5
Best insult: (Dutch, to Rock): "Rock, you dumb fuck. I told you to leave that kid behind."
Out-of-context: "Dutch, I know what I want for Christmas."
"Cock your hammers."
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