Season 1, Episode 4: "Die Rückkehr des Adlers" ("The Return of the Eagle")

Brand-new review, brand-new story arc. The Black Lagoon mercenaries have nursed their hangovers and are ready to get back out there. Judging by the fact that this episode's title is in German, I'm guessing this has to do with World War II. And Nazis. Because German.

If anyone reading this knows how to speak German, can you let me know in the comments section how to pronounce that umlaut (ü)? Better yet, how do you pronounce the whole title of the episode?


It's a beautiful day out on the China Sea. The fish are swimming, the water is clear... it makes Rock reminisce about when he used to scuba dive.

I'm guessing this was before the BP oil spill disaster.

We cut to a flashback from 1945 at the Naval Base at Kiel, where Nazis are regretfully fleeing a burning Germany. However, they're also looking forward to reaching warm weather out on the seas for once. The captain of the ship looks over at the S.S. Officer staring blankly into the sea--and already we can tell there's some negative energy between them.

We jump back to present day. Rock comments on how easy-peezy his life was before joining Black Lagoon. He stops before a small old man who is selling air tanks for much more than Rock can afford, and figures it's best to pass on the offer otherwise Revy will tear him a new asshole for being such a sucker. Notice Dutch in the background, who I'm sure can hear every internal thought Rock has, because he has a habit of talking to himself out loud. So those narrations we've been hearing from him the past three episodes--those weren't his internal thoughts? Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle. You know what they say about people who talk to themselves... they're insane.

Back to the Nazis. When they reach the Indian Ocean, they spot a freighter ship in the distance. The S.S. Officer, who apparently has been absent from this trip the entire time, suggests that they should stop watching it and just continue moving, but the captain tells him that it's a ship sending fuel to England to aid in the destruction of the Axis, and so they should be stopped. The S.S. Officer reminds him that sinking their ship won't do anything to save Germany (kind of like how scooping buckets of water out of a window won't stop a flooding bathroom), but the captain just looks at him with awe, realizing that the Officer might be right, but orders his men to launch torpedoes at the freighter anyway.

Meanwhile, Rock is in the apartment calculating their torpedo boat's fuel efficiency. Kind of a nice transition, there. Very clever.

Dutch comes in with a sly smile on his face and secrets in his heart--oh, and two giant-ass oxygen tanks for him and Revy. Is Dutch psychic? Probably. Is he psycho? Ehh... probably.

Off-season Santa at your service. Just leave a pack of cigarettes and Playboy on the coffee table this year.

No, but really--he must have overheard Rock trying to negotiate with the merchant earlier and decided to do him a solid. That was nice of him.

The Nazis are just about ready to attack the freighter from behind, but they pick up another ship on their radar and it turns out to be a trap. They distract one ship with a torpedo, but the other one is right on top of them. It activates its sonar and drops depth charges right on top of them. They crash to the bottom of the sea, damaging the engine and emergency generator beyond repair.

The engine room floods with water, shutting down the entire machine. The captain and his crew are essentially doomed--and with two hours of air remaining, the captain allows everyone to choose their method of death. Surprisingly, no one brought any emergency cyanide pills with them. What, are they that cocky they didn't think they'd get stuck in a point of no return? It's called planning ahead, gentlemen. Why do you think parents always yell for their kids to put a helmet on when riding their bikes?

Strangely, the captain remains surprisingly calm given that he's hours away from dying. Must be in shock. As for the rest of the crew, well, it's a mixed bag. One guy committed the ancient Japanese suicide honor (sepuku). One guy is curled up in the corner crying. The rest are possibly in shock as well. I know this is going to sound sick, but I actually feel bad that they're about to die. They're still human, despite being Nazis, and I can only imagine what it must feel like to be told that you're breathing your last breaths and there's no way of ever escaping. These men have families and friends back at home.

The captain breaks the news to the S.S. Officer, who is on the floor cradling one of Hitler's paintings, "The Twelve Knights Led by Brunhilda."

He claims that it's going to become a beacon for the next Nazi war, and that the painting should be hidden until then, thus revealing to the captain that he never believed they would win this war to begin with.

The captain is offended that, even as they are slowly running out of oxygen, the Officer cares more about war honor than his own family who is currently at home worried sick about him. What an asswipe. At first, I was going to call the captain out on killing them both faster by burning up their remaining oxygen by smoking his pipe, but honestly, the captain is doing them both a favor. What kind of lowlife scum doesn't consider his own family on his deathbed? Not that I expected him to curl up in a corner and cry for his wife and kid, but for him to clutch to this painting over everything else, it just goes to show what some people value in life: family, money, or in this case--honor.

I feel sorry for the woman who spread her legs for this asshole.

The S.S. Officer gets pissed off that the captain doesn't share his values, and the captain says the downfall of Hitler's reign is worth them all dying at the bottom of the sea. So, the Officer whips out his gun and takes two shots at the captain.

Meanwhile, Rock contemplates over the mysteries of The Dutch. Perhaps his psychic powers is a key to his background that we know nothing about. He whines about opening his big, fat mouth about how much he loved scuba diving, and now he's stuck doing it for a mission. Revy tells him to shut up and get his gear on--it's almost time to go scuba diving in a skeleton closet. Literally and figuratively.

Benny gives everyone the rundown of the night the Nazis died. Basically, this is a 30-second tl;dr synopsis of the previous scenes for those who decided to get up and get a snack while the Nazis were talking. Benny brings up a very good question, though: why would the S.S. Officer board the submarine with only a seemingly average-looking painting? That prompts this face:

That's where Black Lagoon comes in. They were hired by an antique art collector in Spain to go into the submarine and retrieve the painting, which should be well-preserved considering there's neither oxygen nor water in the cabin to break it down.

But seriously, what kind of hobby is it to collect Nazi artwork? Is there someone out there who collects KKK journal entries?

So, here's the plan:

"Fuck plan vom schiff = fuck plan from ship."

The plan is for Rock and Revy to go in through the torpedo tubes, weld them shut, blow the door open, grab the painting, and then blow their way out. Sounds simple enough, right?

Revy, unsurprisingly, bitches to Rock to stop bitching himself. Dutch tosses Revy an underwater rifle, complimentary of Balalaika. With a beaming smile, off she goes, telling Rock to follow her lead. We discover that Revy also has a natural swimming talent, which is part of the reason why Dutch hired her in the first place.

Rock and Revy find the submarine rather quickly. Meanwhile, Benny spots a research ship in the distance that wasn't supposed to be anywhere near there. Why are these guys always being watched? It seems like every time Black Lagoon is in a seemingly isolated area, boom, spies. Granted, they are pirates, so I shouldn't be too surprised that they're being watched by others. Dutch tells Benny to put up their Thai Navy flag as cover-up, though they probably should have done that as soon as they idled.

The other ship radios in and asks the same questions Black Lagoon wants to know about them: who the hell are they, and what the hell are they doing out there? Seems like the other ship is well-aware of the $50,000 painting that lies below. Dutch pretends to be a Thai Navy captain to protect Black Lagoon's identity. He tries to get their information, but they don't respond accordingly. This alarms Benny and Dutch, who agree that this isn't normal.

We cut to the neo-Nazis on the "research ship," and the first thing I noticed is the neo-Nazi symbol used instead of the well-known and banned swastika: the Sturmabteilung

This is really interesting because this isn't just a made-up symbol like I initially thought just to get past the FCC or something. This is an accurate depiction of neo-Nazi iconography.

These neo-Nazis aren't stupid--they know the Black Lagoon boat isn't affiliated with the Thai Navy, but instead are "bandits" attempting to call dibs on their "rightful" property. Hey, you snooze you lose. You've had 50 years to haul ass to this sunken submarine--why do you suddenly want to go after it now?

Anyway, the neo-Nazis send three homing anti-tank missiles right at Black Lagoon. Dutch guns the engine, and off they go.

I wonder if they would have still done this if the Black Lagoon ship was, instead, a little old man and his grandson fishing in their little rowboat.

The first part of the episode arc comes to a conclusion right as Rock and Revy enter the submarine.


OVERALL:

Story - This story is split into two parts. I found the sinking of the submarine half to be quite insightful, showing us that even Nazis can possess traits that humanize them. Normally, when we hear about Nazis, we tend to view them as a group--carbon copy, inhumane robots mindlessly following orders instead of individual people. But for actually making me feel sympathy for them (minus the S.S. Officer), that's some damn good writing.

5 / 5

Character Depth - The highlight is the S.S. Officer who cares more about honor than he does about his own family. There's not much else other than that this episode. Some people are just dicks.

3 / 5

Badassery - There are no battles or twists of character this episode, so the action elements are at an all-time low. This isn't a bad thing; it's actually nice that the episode can hold up well without a bloody battle. And for that, it's badass.

4 / 5

Best Insult: (Nazi captain to the S.S. Officer) "I have no regrets even now as I am destined to rot here. However, if there's one dissatisfaction I do have, it is the fact that I must share a casket with some fucking bastard like you, who isn't even thinking about his family in his dying moments."

Out-of-context: "I never would have hired her if using those guns were her only skill."