Season 1, Episode 2: "Mangrove Heaven"

One thing I forgot to mention about Black Lagoon is that there are eight episode arcs, making up a total of eight "stories" split between three seasons. The story we are currently on will conclude next episode. Just to refresh your memory, Rock has been pulled into Black Lagoon's world of bombs, battles, and Revy's ever-so-colorful vocabulary. On top of that, he just found out that his company, Asahi Industries, has been secretly making bombs in order to boost their business. Oh, and Rock has been shot at more times in one afternoon than one person should ever have to be shot at. It's no surprise that Rock is pissed off and scared out of his mind right now. So, let's watch him freak out some more!

Kageyama plans a business trip with Rock's superior to the Sea of Heaven where Rock is considered "dead."

So, we get some distracting imagery of beautiful island life surrounding the hostile, crime-ridden city of Roanapur. Gee, why does this feel an awful lot like a TV ad for Roanapur tourism? Those poor tourists--they think they're walking into Bermuda when it's really Afghanistan. Isn't this kind of how North Korea is right now?

So, we pick up right where we left off last episode, with Rock complaining about why he's the one who has to suffer. You know that really cool image of Rock throwing that giant ass gun into the water fading into the end credits? Well, that wasn't so cool at all, considering that gun cost more than the amount Rock's therapy bill is going to be by the end of this year. Revy grabs him by his life jacket and curses him out. I don't blame her--weapons are expensive, and Black Lagoon is kind of running on commission. 

Why does he look like Marty McFly?

Rock starts complaining again, kicking the torpedo launcher that, just moments ago, he was cowering under. And now he's the one telling Revy to shut up! Okay, this jump in personality is just... I don't want to say unrealistic, but Rock should realize that he's not in any position to tell Revy to shut up, considering she can blast him over the edge of the boat without even blinking. Rock is so quick to give up--he would actually rather die in the hands of Revy than continue being shot at by mercenaries. But we all know who has a better chance at killing him first. 

Dutch and Benny realize something is wrong when Extra Order stops shooting at them completely. Could it possibly be that the pilot of the airship was having more fun watching Rock and Revy beat each other up like schoolyard children? Honestly, this is probably the only joy he gets in his life, being a mercenary and all. We saw last episode how he was telling his teammate how it was nice to have a challenge for once. He's like Extra Order's Revy.

Dutch and Revy realize that they're not safe, despite the skies being so quiet, so they turn the boat around and make a run for it. Or a cruise for it? Boats don't run. 

The Extra Order mercenaries aren't stupid, as much as we'd like to believe. They follow Black Lagoon like a hawk to a mouse, and start shooting. 

They sail into the mouth of a river. You know, with no other way out. Of all the places they could have gone! At least if they would have stayed out in the sea, they could have stood a chance at dodging the bullets. But now they're enclosed in this tiny, meandering strip of water with no means of defense whatsoever. It's like playing bowling with the bumpers up. (But yet somehow, I still manage to completely miss the pins. I suck at bowling. Maybe this case is similar.)

Extra Order continues to keep on Black Lagoon's tail from a safe distance. This could be the perfect opportunity for them to start shooting, but I think they're holding back just to intimidate them. An excellent maneuver for a villain, I must say. 

Black Lagoon circles around a capsized ship by the river's edge. The Extra Order helicopter stops right above it. The main guy piloting the helicopter taunts Black Lagoon to himself. Damn, he's really having the time of his life, isn't he? It makes me wonder just how powerful these guys are, considering Black Lagoon is the first real challenge they've had in what seems like a long, overdue time. It would have been hysterical if he actually shouted out his taunts to them, especially this one line: "You wanna show me a little ass, that's fine with me." Just that one out the speakers, just totally out-of-context. 

And then, wouldn't you know--a dead end. 

So, how will it be, guys? Cremation, buried, or should they donate your organs to charity? You've taken so much already; it might be nice to give back.

Dutch figures out that this was all planned--Extra Order trapped them in there on purpose. Why should this be any surprise? 

Rock slowly returns back to his normal, neurotic self. He screams for Dutch to do something--shoot at them, turn around, something. And then he gets punched in the face for being stupid. Isn't that Revy's job?

Basically, Black Lagoon is nothing but one big sitting duck. They have insufficient weapons, except for that big ass torpedo, which would likely blow them up before anyone else. Rock, for some reason, develops testicles and decides the best course of action would be to defeat Extra Order straight on. You know, face-to-face. Tete-a-tete. Head-to-head. (Boat-to-helicopter?) Dutch thinks that idea sucks more than Sleeping Beauty (see previous episode), but Rock's balls are too big for him to relinquish the idea now. Honestly, where did this surge of confidence come from? It wasn't there when they were being shot at in the bar.

Could this be what people call a second puberty?

Rock speculates that the pilot of Extra Order's helicopter is a real head honcho who believes he's invincible, so he wouldn't be able to resist a good old-fashioned game of chicken. But how are they going to be able to pull this off? This ain't the Magic School Bus. Do they expect the pilot to just fly down to them or...?

I only screenshot this just to show you that Dutch actually has at least one eye. 

Black Lagoon turns around. Rock goes out on the deck with a flare gun, Revy with an anti-tank rifle. They approach the helicopter, just close enough for Revy to get their attention by shooting at it. In response, the helicopter launches to heat-seeking missiles at them. That's when Rock fires the flare gun. Naturally, the missiles aren't sentient, so they head right for the glowing orb of heat in the sky instead of the measly humans.

Black Lagoon heads back for the capsized ship for its "Grand Finale." The pilot mistakes this for hiding, and swoops in to take them out. Black Lagoon uses the ship as a ramp, launching themselves into the air and at the helicopter. This is some Grand Theft Auto shit right here. Now, I'm not one to debate the laws of physics in animation, but considering that this is supposed to be semi-realistic, it's safe to say that something like this just wouldn't happen--not without the entire Black Lagoon crew dead upon impact when landing back in the sea.

In the air, Dutch fires two of his torpedoes. One hits the helicopter. Dutch's head breaks the windshield; normal physics dictates that such an act should give him a concussion at the very least. But again, cartoon physics don't matter here. And the payoff?

Somehow, Dutch's head smashing through the windshield doesn't seem all that painful.

For Dutch to not even get so much as a scratch on that bald-ass head of his is amazing. Is that thing made out of chrome? Someone contact the Terminator--Dutch can give him a few pointers.

Through Rock's narration, his little badass moment has come to an end. The rush of adrenaline came and went.

Black Lagoon meets Balalaika on an island just outside of Thailand, and they hand over the disc. Balalaika thanks them for risking their lives (in the most subtle way, of course), and then turns around to hand the disc off to Kageyama... in return for a favor, which is not revealed. Balalaika tells Kageyama that they will discuss this later. Kageyama returns to his car so he can return to Japan, and tells Rock to get in. Rock, with his newfound confidence, decides that he doesn't want to be part of the corporate world anymore, and has found a much more suitable niche in Black Lagoon. And so, he quits. He is supposed to be "dead" after all.

Kageyama is like, "Whatever. Suit yourself," and then drives off. Really? I wouldn't be so quick to let go of one of my most valuable employees. Didn't Kageyama just disclose important nuclear bomb information to him last episode? With Rock out of the company, who's to say he won't leak that information? But here's the thing--if Black Lagoon didn't have ties to Hotel Moscow, Kageyama would have taken Rock out right then and there. So it really doesn't matter.

Balalaika is impressed with the size of Rock's balls, as it has to take some pretty big kahunas to go through the kind of character development Rock went through in just two episodes. Methinks he wasn't actually this feeble weakling after all; he was probably just repressing it until now. Now, he has a chance to be something bigger than a corporate drone. Just like he always wanted.

And thus, Rock officially joins Black Lagoon.

I'm surprised Revy, Dutch, and Benny agree with this so quickly. Is that all it takes to become a pirate mercenary--successfully taking down an enemy gunship and quitting your job after a burst of confidence? Well, taking out an enemy vehicle I can understand, but that was a one-time thing. Rock even said that the surge of adrenaline came and went; could he possibly pull that off again and again? Not that I believe Rock just had beginner's luck, but there have to be some standards for being a modern-day pirate. Computer skills, rock-hard muscles, experience with guns of all kinds... could Rock possibly be their new strategic planner? I figure if Rock skulks away at the next grenade thrown in their direction, Dutch could always push him in front of the line of fire. Or Revy could just blow his brains out. It's a win-win, right?

An unspecified amount of time passes. A few hours, few days, I really don't know. A very large ship has been "following" the Black Lagoon ship for a while now because they're blocking their line of direction. What the hell? Knowing Black Lagoon won't bend over backwards for anyone, it never occurred to these people to go around the tinier ship? It's not like they're limited in the confines of a narrow river like in the beginning of the episode. They're out on the fucking sea. 

(Raspy old man voice) You damn kids! Get off'a my sea!

We get a quick peek back at Asahi Industries to see how hard the company is taking Rock's decision to quit the company. Clapping, cheering on Kageyama that the confidential information leak is a "job well done," yeah, that's pretty much the reaction I'd have too. Though I would have sprung for a cake with strippers inside. What cheapskates.

Revy complains about Rock not wearing the Hawaiian shirt she bought him back at the market, probably because she doesn't like a man in uniform. Rock stands at the aft of the Black Lagoon ship with a megaphone and politely asks the captain of the St. Joan ship behind them to cease cruising. My God. Rock is... something else. What if, instead, Black Lagoon was a team of bank robbers? How would Rock handle that?

This scene from SpongeBob SquarePants immediately came to mind.

The St. Joan ship stops pissing themselves laughing when Revy pulls out a goddamn rocket launcher and blasts the front of their ship. She grabs the megaphone and demands that they drop the anchor or else she'll pop a cap in their asses. I assume that Revy posed enough of a threat, because the ship raises a white flag in surrender.

We get a seemingly random scene of Kageyama returning home and interacting with his family, and I'm only mentioning this because of his dog's name. John. Who the hell names their dog "John"?

"Come here, John. Come here, boy."
"Go fetch the stick, John."
"John! Stop shitting on the carpet!"

Rock is in a sort-of daze now that it's finally sunken in that he is officially a pirate mercenary. A criminal. And he joined out of choice. Now he has taken over a ship, with Revy leading the way. What will come next?

OVERALL:

Story - While a nice transition from the first part into the third, the fact that Revy, Dutch, and Benny are impressed by Rock enough to let them be part of their crew just seems so out-of-character for them. I guess they figured they were truly vulnerable when E.O. had them cornered, but even still, they didn't have to accept Rock in, especially knowing how much of a pansy he is.

4/5

Character Depth - Again, Rock's unveiled burst of adrenaline seems to come out of nowhere. Unless Rock merely snapped under pressure, his change seems like a deus ex-machina to give him an excuse to be considered good enough for the team. Had this transition been spread out over a few more episodes, it would have made more sense.

3/5

Badassery - Rock's plan to use a flare gun and the capsized ship to take down the E.O. helicopter is genius, but nothing unheard of. However, it's nice to see the underdog come out on top, and every scene (minus Rock's first ship hold-up) screamed, "That's metal as fuck!"

5/5

Best Insult: "I say we go face-to-face with these guys." - Rock
                     "Are you retarded?" - Dutch

Out-of-Context: "You wanna show me a little ass, that's fine with me."
                             "Amen, Hallelujah, and Peanut Butter."